I know its been awhile. I've had a very busy semester with not much time to write. A lot of things have been happening its just been crazy but God has been teaching me alot. I have so many posts to write I don't know where to begin.
This semester has been a hard one. I'm taking Chemistry. Anyone that knows me knows I am not a science person. That is why I am an interior design major. I hate science. I don't get it and someone trying to explain it to me doesn't help me understand it anymore than I already do. So it has been a struggle to say the least.
On top of that, My grandma was diagnosed with breast cancer in february. My grandpa had cancer. He died in 2006 from it. My aunt (all on the same side of the family) has cancer. Her and my grandma are both going through chemo right now. I was not prepared for this. I saw my grandpa and aunt go through this pain. I wasn't ready to see my grandma go through this same pain. I was so mad that she had cancer. On top of everything else. I didn't understand God's plan in doing this.
That is just the thing though. I don't need to understand God's plan. I will never understand God's plan. God knows what He is doing. He created ALL things. He knows EVERYTHING. What do I know? I can't even understand Chemistry. That is why He is in control and I am not.
My grandma having cancer hasn't been easy. It has taken away from my time with my mom because she has been going down to help take her and my aunt to appointments and treatments. It is hard seeing Meme sick and in pain. BUT God has a plan. He doing something big. My grandma is doing pretty well though. If you could keep her and my aunt in your prayers that would be awesome!
A song I have loved through this whole deal has been Blessings by Laura Story. It has helped me realize God is always in control. He will work in ways I can't imagine (even through my pain) and He is always with me. No matter what.
* I'm posting the lyrics because I love them, but if you don't want to read them I recommend youtubing it. They have some awesome videos of this song. For some reason it won't let me post a link to one. Anyways, here are the lyrics.
Blessings by Laura Story:
We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things
Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise
We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe
Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
And what if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise
When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know the pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home
Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise
Whatever you are going through, God will work through it, bring you closer to Him, and make you stronger. He will bring you through your fire, He is just refining you in the process!
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